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Matilda ShowbizOga MAT

A-B-R-A-C-A-D-A-B-R-A! (2)

The FrontierThe FrontierJune 20, 2026 451 Minutes read0

Replay

…continued from last week’s edition

As I resume on dat Wednesday morning, for di 3 days wey I dey work for dis party for dia primary election, I hear nwi. Di kind tings wey my mouth see, my eye no fit talk am.

Na during di contract I come know wetin e mean wen dem dey talk am say “Baba sope”. If you no know di meaning, ask Google. Abeg, I no want any wahala.

If you say you be member of dat party, and you no respect “Baba sope”, na im be say you be first class M.U.M.U., becos, na anyting wey Baba talk, na im go happen.

If you tink say you get power, go buy nomination form for 30 million, 50 million or 100 million sef, if Baba no confirm say na you go win, you just dey waste your time and money.

Na for dia I see how dem dey count people wey don line up to vote.

If na two people dem one vote for, you go see 5 people for one line. For di second line you go see like 200 people. And if you see as dem go count di second line, my broda, e go shock you gan.

You go hear, “One! Ten! Hundred! One Thousand! Two Thousand and Five! Four Thousand!!!” And na dat 4000 vote dem go declare. For line wey only 200 people tanda o. Na dat time you go know say na Baba sope line be dat. And na dat person dem go declare winner. Tell me, which Abracadabra pass dat one?

And if anybody just open im mouth make pim, hmmm, na im be say Area Boys dem go use dat person head do pepper soup.

I come talk am for my mind say, if ordinary primary election wey all of dem dey for di same party be like dis, how di main di main election go come be next year 2027? Tori Olorun!

Make we jam again next Saturday.

Tank you

Tank you very much

And tank you very, very much indeed.

*Created by Sunny Okim, Oga MAT (Day-to-day experiences of a Lagos taxi driver) is the longest running Pidgin column in Nigeria’s media, since 1994.

 

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